Flawed

Today I have been thinking, I know that's not always a good thing, but bear with me.As I was thinking I thought about the fact that we all make mistakes. Each one of us has things that either annoy others or just aren't a good thing in general. This includes myself. They are lists and lists of flaws that I have and some I am better at admitting than others, but either way I have them. This doesn't mean I am worthless or no good. This means there are things I need to work on. So too start I want to tell you at least 15 of my flaws. Some I know others see as a flaw in me and are harder for me to admit and others are flaws I see in myself every day. 

1. I bite my nails.

2. I worry more than I should.

3. I over think and analyze everything. 

4. I am bad at staying out of things. 

5. I am on my phone more than I should be. 

6. I complain about being cold too much. 

7. I am awful at making decisions.

8. I am too scared to step out of my comfort zone. 

9. I procrastinate. 

10. I have eyes that don't work well. 

11. I trust too easily. 

12. Fruit snacks are my favorite food. 

13. I hate shots.
14. I watch ABC Family too much.
15. I stay out too late. 

Those are just 15 of the many flaws I have. I could keep listing, but that is not the point of this. Some of you may not view all of these as flaws, but for me they are, whether I can control all of them or not. I know that I am not perfect, I am far from it. Over time, maybe one or two of those flaws will finally go away. 

What I am trying to say is that none of us are perfect. Not one person doesn't have some kind of flaw. Our flaws make us who we are though. We can learn from them and grow from them, making us someone better. Just because you have a flaw doesn't mean you can't work on it, get it to disappear and become a better person. As we look around the world, I do think we need to stop focusing on the flaws. Start looking at the good. How are we suppose to live happy if all we see is the negative? Yes, I am flawed, but that doesn't mean I don't have good things about me too. We have to remember that there is positive around us as well. Walking down the street, if you see someone struggle, stop and help instead of questioning why they are taking up too much of the sidewalk. If you see someone looking angry walking around, and avoiding people, try to understand that they could have just found out some bad news instead of just saying, "What's their problem?". We all have struggles and we all have flaws. One of the biggest flaws being the lack of love for each other. No we don't have to go around saying "I love you" to everyone. Not everyone is able to do that. We can however show it. Many may say, but I don't love everyone. This person did this to me. I don't even know them. We are just too different. They hurt me. They don't care. In my opinion, that is just the more reason to love them. Maybe they did what they did or feel that way because someone did the same to them. We all have pasts and those pasts affect who we are, In some of my darkest times, a single hug from a friend is what kept me going. A single act of kindness to show their love and that they did care.

I'll get back, more directly, to flaws. Like I said we are all flawed. It is just part of who we are. If we weren't we wouldn't be human. No matter how difficult, we have to be willing to step back and see the flaws in our self and accept that they are there. Whether we work on them now or later or realize they aren't flaws in reality is not the point. Accepting those flaws is. Accepting that no single person on this Earth is flawless. In my opinion being flawless isn't perfect, being perfect is being flawed. 

Now don't take this and look at every flaw and hate. Take it and see what you need to work on and see what is maybe a flaw to you, but in reality beautiful. One of the flaws I have had to do this with, is my eyes. I have terrible eye sight and it isn't getting any better. With corrected vision I still cannot get my right eye to perfect vision. I feel silly in glasses and feel as though I stick out like a sore thumb. If I don't have my classes or contacts in I can't read something a foot in front of me. I will never be able to just wake up in the morning and just go. I will never be able to go on hikes, or really any activity, without worrying if I am going to get something in my contacts. Going swimming in the ocean or in a pool, I always have to make sure that I am careful or else I could lose a contact and not be able to see at all. To me this is a flaw. But I have also come to the fact that it is part of me and not everyone else views it as a flaw. I have stopped being upset with myself over something I cannot change. So do the same for you. Understand there are things we can't change. 

Yes we all have flaws and we have to accept that, but we are also beautiful human beings and we can't forget that either. 

Sorry if this post felt like it was jumping around, I'm not sure I was able to get my thoughts down quite as well this time. Let me know if there is anything you want to hear about.

Much love, 

MJ